We’ve all experienced moments that leave us flattened. It might be a frightening diagnosis for us or a loved one. A job loss. A divorce or other personal crisis. Unrelenting fears about climate change or the state of the country.
When it feels as if the 10 Plagues of Egypt are all raining down on you, making it through the day can be a challenge, let alone knowing how to face a future that might not be what you expected.
Feeling stress is a natural response to your environment, according to Sheena Baker,licensed clinical social worker and social work intern program supervisor with Novant Health’s Office of Health Equity and Community Health. In a previous position, she treated patients at one of the Novant Health Michael Jordan Family Medical Clinics in Charlotte.
The nervous system receives stressful information through sight, sound and other senses. When we get stressed, “it starts to affect our sleep, our mood, and our motivation,” Baker said. She offers these coping tools to help lift anyone facing difficult times.
Focus on what’s in your control. Look at how your behaviors might contribute to your stress. One example: Set boundaries between your work and personal life. If possible, don’t answer work-related emails after work so you can focus on family and other interests. Resist the urge to just take a peek for "piece of mind." Or start by doing it less then build on the habit.
Take breaks from social media and 24/7 news. Baker signs off from social media for several weeks at a time to avoid clickbait and algorithms that highlight the most alarming posts first. If you’re a news junkie, at least turn off your news alerts. You can check sites a few times a day. Stepping back from the firehose can make a big difference.
Regarding the news, she suggests reviewing which news sources you consume and when. Maybe your lunch break is a better time than right out of bed to help set a calmer tone for the day.
Connect with people in real life. “Spending time with people in-person releases our happy hormone, dopamine,” Baker explained. “When you hang out with friends, family, neighbors, church members, or social groups, you feel included and safe. Safety is the opposite of stress and angst.”
Baker recommends Meetup as a way to find others who share your interests. Introverts might try game nights at a local brewery or restaurant. “You can focus on the game without having to be so focused on the people, but you're still getting that interaction,” Baker said.
Even waving at a neighbor or giving someone a compliment at the coffee shop works. Spending time with pets also releases dopamine and reduces anxiety.
Find hobbies you enjoy. Pick one that takes a lot of time, like learning to play an instrument, or a little, like listening to music after work. Either way, hobbies help calm the nervous system by focusing the brain on something fulfilling and enjoyable rather than on stress-provoking circumstances that typically resolve themselves. The point is not to be the best or even good at something. It’s the effort that can make a difference.
Exercise. “We experience stress physically. If we stay active, that helps release stress hormones like cortisol,” Baker explained. Go to the gym or try free alternatives like dancing, walking, yoga videos online, or playing with your children in ways that require movement. Build in exercise during the day, such as parking farther from the store entrance to get more steps.
Care for yourself with nutritious foods. It’s natural to reach for donuts or potato chips in times of stress. But poor nutrition can lead to irritability, anxiety and difficulty concentrating, leaving you unable to think through stressful situations, Baker said. Emphasize nutrient-rich foods in your meals, including salmon, beans, nuts and seeds, citrus fruits and leafy greens to help your brain and body function well. Go easy on caffeine and alcohol.
Harness tech that supports mental health. Novant Health patients can take advantage of the NeuroFlowapp, with guided imagery videos, journaling, breathing exercises and articles for mental health. Talk to your primary care provider about this option.
Try Calm or Headspace apps for meditation. Baker likes Daylio, which allows you to track activities that affect your mood. “You can start to determine what you want to do more of in your life that helps you feel better,” she said, “and what you want to decrease.”
If possible, take action to address your fears. It’s easy to linger on worries about the future when something devastating happens. Consider where you can take action, from having a thoughtful conversation with your spouse to attending a public meeting about a proposed government policy. “If we find ways to take action,” Baker said, “that usually gives us a sense of feeling better because we've thought about what options we might have.”
Remember: You were built for this.
How long it will take to feel better will vary by person and situation. Minor disappointments usually lessen over a few days, while the death of a loved one might take years to work through. If you’ve tried these recommendations for a month and not seen any progress, consider seeking support from a therapist.
To those who are dragging through their days, Baker offers hope and perspective. “You were literally built for this,” she said. “Our ancestors have seen worse. They’ve been through just as many shocking and scary things, and they made it. Sometimes we have to remind ourselves we have what it takes to get through anything. And how do we know that? Because we have their DNA. We’ve been through so much and nothing has got us yet.”
Michael Jordan Family Medical Clinics: Providing care in times of stress
Basketball legend Michael Jordan donated $17 million to Novant Health in support of the Michael Jordan Family Medical Clinics to care for underserved communities in Charlotte and his hometown of Wilmington, North Carolina. Many of the people they care for would be thrilled to trade their problems with the challenges more privileged people are struggling with.
“The clinics serve patients who might be uninsured or underinsured, while providing the same quality of care that you would see anywhere else throughout Novant Health,” said social worker Sheena Baker. She worked at one of the Charlotte clinics before becoming social work intern program supervisor with Novant Health's Office of Health Equity and Community Health.
For some patients, transportation is a barrier to care, so having a nearby clinic is helpful. Families with children and other patients at the clinics can access primary care doctors, therapists, and community health workers all in one spot. Community health workers provide resources for a diverse array of needs, from stable housing and healthy food to referrals to vision care or assistance applying to Medicaid.
Novant Health offers financial assistance to clinic patients who meet income guidelines. “We’ve seen people be sick and stressed and not know why,” Baker said. “They can come here, get a diagnosis early, and get treatment so their stress is not compounded.”
